been a while since my last post…I havent died, I’m just…I don’t know, emotionally dead right now.
a lot of stuff has happened. a lot of it touched me. I can’t get this boy that opened fire in a school in europe out of my mind. Why was his youtube video in english, when the words he uttered clearly were among the only ones he knew in english? Why did he choose his school as target when his aim was to kill as many people as possible? He was a kind of average smart kid, he probably could’ve realized that he could’ve killed a lot more people in, say, a supermarket for example. He claims he hates the people, he chooses a location that isn’t very crowded. He shoots only people that are close to him. Mostly girls. I’m puzzled.
I’m tired. I’m fed up. I’m kinda depressed. Everything seems so pointless right now. I’m not angry. And not sad either. It feels very weird. I feel so empty. I’ve begun to hear the silence that creeps in every evening. It’s so loud. I haven’t felt emotions for quite a while. Haven’t really realized it either, I’m merely finding out it know, writing. Scary.
